Thursday, December 10, 2009

Dream Life

My relationship to dreams is an evolving story. Like everyone, I've been dreaming all my life, but the value I place on it has changed. I definitely had my dreams as a child. I chose only a few because I didn't want to bite off more than I could chew. I wanted to travel the world before getting married, I wanted the world's biggest music collection, and I wanted to adopt if I ever had a child because I thought there were already too many living children who needed love. This is what I thought about when I was seven.

As I grew into my 20s, the mp3 was invented, so that took care of my music dream. I now have about 100 gigabytes of music, and I have to say that I don't feel the need to acquire much more. It's not the world's biggest music collection, but that part of my ego doesn't need to prove itself anymore.

I traveled the world--15 countries to be exact. I'm married now, but the part I didn't include in my childhood dream is that marriage isn't an end. I continue to travel with and without my husband. Our idea of marriage is an ever changing unique design that doesn't adhere to what my society unsuccesfully tried to force on me.

As far as kids are concerned, no, I don't have any. Actually, I want to say this dream changed, but it didn't because I always left it open-ended. As a child, I always made sure to install the big "If I have kids" when I put any energy into this dream. I'm still a child. I have friends who are kids, but no, I don't think I'm the one to have them.

Looking back, I can say most of my major childhood dreams did come true. There may have been small parts that didn't pan out, but I know that's because I modified the dream, like with the "biggest music collection in the world" bit. I realized that wasn't what I really wanted and 100 gigs was enough.

About the only remaining childhood dream is that I would like to have a coffee with any of the remaining members of Monty Python. I'm still alive, and so are they (minus one-Graham Chapman rest in peace). There's still time, and I'll update this entry when it happens.

What is so different about dreaming as a child and dreaming now? As a child, I didn't realize that I could make all my dreams come true. Now that I'm an adult, I made most of my dreams come true. For the past couple of years, I've been focusing on what to dream next. Yeah, I have new ones. They're personal, but they don't seem to matter as much anymore. Dreaming for myself is fine and necessary to some extent, but what I do now is dream for the world. I dream of peace. This is my number one dream now and I believe it can happen, because I have no other choice but to believe it.

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